The Number 1 Most Important Intervention for People Pleasers

There are many interventions a people pleaser can undertake to improve themselves. However, the number one most important is by far therapy. Therapists train for thousands of hours and learn coping skills they can teach their clients.

No two people will experience the exact same issues so thankfully, there are a multitude of therapies to address specific issues. Check out this Very Well Mind article describing different therapies There are many reasons to hire yourself a therapist, and I’ve listed a few here.

Therapists Train for Thousands of Hours

Therapists attend graduate school to learn their profession like any other professional. After graduating they shadow other therapists. The required hours of post-degree clinical experience depend on the program, but it can range from 1000 to 3000 and more. They gain valuable experience before ever being one on one with a client.

Objective Voice and Listener

When you’re dealing with serious life issues, communication is one of the most important components of problem solving. Many times, effective communication is halted with tone, yelling, passive-aggressive comments, insults, and other unhealthy barriers in communication.

A well-trained therapist will actively listen to you and give objective advice in YOUR best interest. Therapists don’t have an agenda unlike those close to you might naturally have.


Process Difficult Memories, Trauma, and Conflicts

I think of trauma as being imbedded into the neurological pathways that were forming when the trauma took place. I also think of therapy as a process to unravel the pathways containing trauma so one can heal.

If a person has zero conflicts, they’re most likely a people pleaser dying on the inside, or they’ve put in the work to improve themselves to better handle past trauma and confrontation. I see people on the daily that need help navigating conflicts, including myself at times. I have to remind myself what I’ve learned from my therapists over the years and what strategies I know to be helpful. It’s definitely intentional work.

Benefits of Therapy

As long as you’re connecting with your therapist, you’ll experience multiple benefits.

  • Improved communication will in turn help to improve relationships at home and work.
  • Learning to take care of yourself mentally will allow you to feel peace and joy and not feel as overwhelmed.
  • You’ll experience less depression and anxiety.
  • Finding your voice and taking back your power becomes easier.

So, to some of you, it might seem like therapy is just you talking with some random who can give you general advice that you could get from any of your friends. That’s where you’re wrong. These are professionals who’ve studied human behaviors, cognition, and multiple therapies to unravel your brain pathways so you’re better able to function despite, well, life. Find a therapist online at

Jenn Kemp, PMHNP, is a dedicated psychiatric and mental health nurse practitioner with a personal and professional commitment to helping others overcome people-pleasing behaviors. Having navigated her own journey through these habits, Jenn combines clinical expertise with genuine empathy to guide her readers towards healthier, more authentic lives.

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